Thursday, September 20, 2007

Winter is coming: Who wants to be my electric blanket?

The long awaited dating review is here!

(Disclaimer: I will not be too specific on these descriptions because you never know who might be reading...I shudder to think that any boys might encounter this blog, because everybody knows BlogWorld belongs exclusively to girls.)

I consider my dating life smokin' if I have a date every week or two. That's been happening lately so I actually have some things to report, but sometimes I use the term 'date' rather loosely. Some would consider this a quota-filling, self-deluded way to think, but I just like being able to check "Romance" off on my master list, okay?

Date #1 — The Phantom Masseur: Having met this one on a recent vacation and receiving some unsolicited physical contact from him, I wasn't terribly surprised when he acquired my phone number from someone else and asked me out. Nor was I terribly excited, because I find it distracting when every time I look there's some creature staring at me like...I don't know what like, but not too much unlike an 8th grader looks at the worm they're about to dissect. Googly, yes. Friendly? Not sure.
Anyway, have you ever been in a situation where a person is desparately seeking your approval/attention/applause? I realize this sounds really cocky, but I'm just going to tell it like it is. He was saying things he thought were funny or talking in a weird voice and out of my peripheral vision I can see him watching to see if I laughed. And we all know I can't fake it.
Highlights: Turkey races
Candice and Dave and family
Getting home by 10:30
Lowlights: Worst Navajo taco ever
Remember that whole staring thing?
Getting home by 10:30 (means it was a bad date)
Wrap up: Nice guy, no chemistry, not connected enough to do anything other than avoid future phone calls. And I'm a really, really bad actress.

Date #2 -- The Set-up: A friend who never sets anybody up decided to set me up with a co-worker, mostly in exchange for his work on a project she needed complete. I don't think I've ever been peddled this way before, and it's sort of...awesome to be traded like some sort of goods or services. This one was an easy crowd--I didn't have to glance at him constantly to see if he was laughing because he rewarded my every quip with a hearty chuckle. Most people know how important it is for me to be rewarded that way, whether it's real or not. It helps that I was in a really good mood from work that day and sort of hyper...
Highlights: Dismantling the weird piece of marketing whatever on the restaurant table
and then complaining to the waiter that somebody ruined our centerpiece.
CD players and speakers in cars. Revolutionary.
Lowlights: He thinks girls have nakey pillow fights.
Not the best burger ever
Again, home by 10:30
Wrap up: Even nicer guy; not creepy, and I really did have a good time. No chemistry, but I hope I didn't ruin any office relationships.

Date #3 -- The Unexpected: Somehow I tricked this one into a date when I invited him to a concert and he couldn't get off work in time...I think he felt really bad and took me to dinner to ease his conscience. Little did he know he would have the time of his life! BAM!! This guy is tricky because I think he's genuinely just nice but everything he does looks a lot like wooing me. And I'm very woo-able in this case. Every time I talk to him I just think he's so cool and that's the only way to describe it. I'm working on working it.
Highlights: Chivalry lives
Surprises galore, ie follow-up texts, etc.
Air guitar
Lowlights: Restaurants close early
Missed concert
Accidently comparing your date to a balding George McFly
Wrap up: I had to think really hard to find lowlights. We'll see where this goes...

Well, I hope you enjoyed my review. Please continue your prayers that I will get dates so we can continue this tradition.

Friday, September 14, 2007

To work is to live

Sometimes I feel like this.

It's been a crazy ride these last couple of weeks. I suffer from manic something, I'm sure, because my mood/personality/outlook on life shifts dramatically every 5 minutes lately. As mentioned to friends, I'm hoping the worst of that ailment is attributable to several things, namely a) New, scary job; b) Lack of sleep; c) Hormonal imbalances; d) Lack of social excitement (AKA I need a boy, dangit!); e) Pining over the loss of school..and my childhood. Thus, I think it only temporary. Patience, grasshopper.
Anyway...The job is good. I like it here and lately have actually been able to eat and, um, breathe a little bit. Still not sure this is quite what I want but since what I want doesn't exist I'm willing to give it a try. I could do without certain people telling me to pick up and move to Manhattan while I'm young and single, though--I don't need confirmation of the evil, anti-practical voices in my head.

So that's my update. Not the most scintillating post yet, and for that I apologize. Stay tuned for a dating review...I think that could be funny.

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Don't drink the Gatorade

Ah. The trip of the summer.

Last weekend I, with 16 of my closest friends, drove 10 hours and hiked 10 miles into this beautiful desert oasis in Supai, AZ. It was so super duper fun, really. And super duper hard on my feeble body. So it's a pretty short trip for such sore muscles, but totally worth it.

Havasupai means "people of the blue-green water" or something, which is a really good description. Well, of the water, I guess. I didn't have much to do with the people. As you can see, the water is beautiful, crystally blue-green and, as Becky's gangrenous left foot will testify, looks deceptively clean and pure. I likened it to blue Gatorade Rain, liberally laced with staph bacteria. Mmmm. Pleasant.

Some highlights:
--Swimming behind Havasu Falls (pic above) and jumping through the raging water
--Navajo Falls. That's all I can say.
--My feet done up in full armor from Camp Counselor Katherine's first aid kit
--The Love Train. If you don't know I'm not telling you.
--Mule carcasses
--Climbing up Beaver Falls with a million other so many zombies
--Loaded Baked instant mashed potatoes
--40-foot cliff jumping. And enemas.
--Laura threatening to kick that girl over the cliff.
--Unsolicited massages
--The look those hard core hikers gave me when they saw me trucking up the trail in nothing but an orange polka-dotted swimsuit and hiking boots. While sweating my brains out. And singing Les Mis. I think I'll run for Miss Havasupai 07.

I need to do a nice summer re-cap blog. I've done much this summer and I think maybe this is my year. Since I seem to be doing most of my living in the short 3-month summer span, I guess my life is over now that it's September.
Actually, September is my favorite month. Hooray!

Here are some more pics for the fans. It was amazing and we had a great group. I am very grateful for good friends and good husbands of those friends. If polygamy comes back I think I'll be set. That statement is not to be taken as lusting after husbands--Think of it more as appreciating chivalry.